Category: Relationships
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Why Letting Go of Perfection Can Lead to Happier Relationships
In relationships, no situation and no one person is perfect. This means we all ‘settle’ for less than our ideal fantasy of a person and circumstance. ‘Settling’ does not mean sacrificing our primary wants and needs. What it does mean is letting go of getting everything on your ‘checklist’ and realizing you don’t need everything…
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How to Cope with Missing Someone After a Relationship Ends
What does missing someone feel like? What does it say about the attachment you had when you miss someone? How to stop missing a friend, family member, or lover if the relationship is over? Missing someone indicates you experienced an emotional attachment that had deep significance for you. We miss people with whom we built…
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How Music Helps Couples Communicate Feelings and Needs
Music is a form of communication between couples that can express and clarify feelings, wants, and needs. It is difficult for some people to find the words or say the words that create vulnerability and intimacy. The fear of rejection or feeling embarrassed can be a deterrent to opening up to a partner. The right…
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When Communication Fails, Trust and Love Are Tested
When communication breaks down, so does trust. When someone you’ve been close to shuts down or completely breaks off communication, it is tempting to decide you no longer care about them and that they are unworthy of your trust and love. Then, unexpectedly, they will do or say something that opens you up to re-engage…
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Why Individuality Is Crucial for a Happy Marriage
Being married should not deny one the right to certain privacies or aspects of their individuality. Anyone who gives in to the ‘we are one’ narrative will not be happy in their marriage. Anyone demanding a ‘oneness enmeshment’ relationship is insecure, controlling, and will ultimately be rejected or abandoned. Modern marriage is healthier…
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Can You Be Friends with an Ex? Benefits and Challenges
Becoming friends with an ex-lover is possible for some, but not for all couples. Deciding how much time is needed to heal from a break-up, what the benefits are to creating a friendship, and assessing the possible downsides are important issues to consider. If a relationship starts out as a friendship before becoming romantic, the…
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How Breaking Up Can Boost Self-Esteem and Personal Growth
Breaking up a relationship that is destined to fail can raise self-esteem, clarify authentic goals, and promote personal growth. A break-up can create lasting emotional growth and personal insight. The strength to let go makes it possible to discover the truth about what you want and what you don’t want. The first line of the…
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Why Effective Listening and Speaking Are Crucial in Relationships
Effective listening and effective speaking are equally important in all forms of relationships. Hearing words being spoken does not indicate an understanding of the meaning, emotion, and intention of what is being communicated. If how communication is delivered is faulty, accurate listening is diminished. “I heard what you said” is a typical response by people…
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Why Controlling Behavior Ruins Relationships
Putting your spouse or lover on a ‘short leash’ will ruin your relationship. Why do people need to assert this level of control over their partner, and why do partners put up with it? In happy, healthy relationships people feel loved when they can be who they are, retain appropriate personal freedom, say ” NO”…
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Why Financial Betrayals Hurt More Than Sexual Ones
Financial betrayals may be more difficult for married couples to recover from than sexual betrayals. How or “if” someone recovers from any kind of betrayal depends a lot on one’s personality, prior experience with trauma, abandonment, or abuse, level of their self-esteem, and how much in love and happy they were with their partner…