• Why People Are Picky Daters: Fear, Ego, or Rigid Standards?

    What psychological issues cause people to be picky daters? Is it low self-esteem, arrogance, fear of intimacy, or rigid standards of wants and needs? The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines picky as “too careful, fussy or choosy about accepting things.” Many argue that what others see as picky is more accurately an assertion of preferences. We all…

  • Why People Lie: Fear, Control, or Low Self-Esteem?

    What causes people to lie? Is it a character flaw, a fear-based attempt to control, or low self-esteem? Can a liar change? The most common reason people lie is to protect themselves from embarrassment, rejection, or punishment. Most people who lie do not intend to damage others. Most people feel guilty about lying but are…

  • Understanding Depression’s Source Improves Treatment

    Understanding the source of your depression increases the odds of a positive treatment outcome. The word depression is frequently misused.  Feeling sad about an upsetting occurrence is normal. Crying if you feel hurt is normal. Sad, hurt feelings are depressing experiences, however usually do not mean a person is suffering from depression. The diagnosis of…

  • Trust: Building It Slowly and Recovering After It’s Broken

    Healthy trust builds over time through a series of kept promises. Trusting someone too soon is emotionally risky and is based on a desperate need to connect. Being unwilling to regain trust that has been lost can be just as self-sabotaging. Many people eager for a relationship make the mistake of deciding a person is…

  • The Balance Between Healthy and Unhealthy Selfishness

    Knowing How And When To Be Selfish Is Important For Maintaining Self Esteem. Being Unselfish Strengthens Intimate Bonds. Healthy Selfishness Is Self-Affirming. Unhealthy Selfishness Involves Self-Obsession And The Neglect Of Others. Selfishness involves being exclusively or excessively concerned for oneself and one’s own pleasure, needs, and wants. Selfish people are consumed with themselves and therefore…

  • How Childhood Trauma Builds Emotional Resilience

    Emotional resilience is one result from growing up in an alcoholic or other type of dysfunctional family system. Those who suffer trauma early in life are often better prepared to cope with stress and crises later in life than those who grew up in healthy, stable home environments. Growing up in an alcoholic family, frightening,…

  • Overcoming Fear and Isolation After COVID Vaccinations

    Despite COVID vaccinations happening by the millions, many remain scared and confused about how to expand out of their pandemic isolation. In the early days of the coronavirus pandemic, the restrictive shelter-in-place order traumatized millions of Americans.  The isolation was frightening, especially for people who lived alone. We longed for a return to our everyday…

  • Smartphone Addiction Hurts Intimacy and Social Functioning

    Smartphone addiction has become a common deterrent to intimacy for couples, families, and friends. Many people are finding it negatively affects emotional, social, and professional functioning. Many Smartphone owners will disagree with anyone who accuses them of being addicted to their phones. As with all addictions, denial is a part of the process. Being defensive…

  • Procrastination Hurts Success but Can Be Overcome

    Procrastination means ” to intentionally put off something that needs to be done.” Everyone occasionally delays doing something they intended to do. Procrastination significantly contributes to under-functioning in the personal and professional aspects of life. The causes of avoidance vary, but they are all treatable. However, this behavior becomes a problem if it becomes to…

  • Why Many Married Couples Stop Having Sex

    The secret many married couples have is that they have stopped having sex. Some of the reasons are based on unhealthy relationship dynamics, breaks in trust, poor communication, loss of chemistry, stress, unresolved personal problems, or health issues. Most people assume married couples have sexual relations regularly. Married couples think they should be having sex…