Millennials admit to exhibiting self-limiting traits that define their generation. They identify too many choices, too many distractions, difficulty with commitment, self-absorption, and being unfocused as common obstacles to their success and happiness. However, their potential to improve what’s wrong in the world is limitless. They just have to commit to caring and getting involved.
Millennials find themselves unemployed, still living with parents, unhappy with their jobs and discouraged about their relationships more than prior generations report. Social and political circumstances they were born into contribute to these situations being their norm. The country is negatively polarized creating the perception of a weakened, unstable country. Violence has become normalized and hatred between different ethnic and religious groups is intensifying. Political parties are committed to destroying each others credibility with aggression and misinformation. Millennials report the negativity of this emotionally toxic environment makes them feel apathetic, fearful, angry, and discouraged. These emotions interfere with personal insight and intellectual clarity which makes committing decisiveness and optimism difficult to achieve.
In an article in Mille titled “Why Millenials Can’t Commit” Simon Sinek described millennials as “tough to manage, entitled, narcissistic, self interested, unfocused, [and] lazy …”Several reasons why he believes these characterizations have developed:
- Bad parenting
- Technology
- Impatience
- Environment
Sinek criticizes parents of millennials for over-feeding their egos with proclamations of how their specialness promised they would get what they want, when they want it. This mindset reduced the drive needed to establish behavioral patterns that lead to goal achievement and a humbleness. Additionally, Sinek sees the addiction to technology as a major contributor to the disconnectedness millennials experience. Obsessive engagement with social media and video games separate them from being present in the moment and causes mental numbness and lack of focus. This state of mind creates both emotional distance and lesser degrees of intimacy with people who are physically present in their lives. Millennials report feeling higher levels of emotionality when interacting with their phones and social media than they do with each other.
Millennials are known for their impatience. For example, they disproportionately experience high levels of frustration when the internet is slow, or the phone won’t charge fast enough, or an Uber takes longer than expected to arrive. Impatience impairs ones ability to make commitments to completing goals. Due to being disappointed in the opportunities they anticipated would be easily available to them after they completed their education, millennials are understandably disillusioned. Finding the right job or relationship takes time and the impatient millennial will often give up because “it’s taking too long.” They assume if something doesn’t work out immediately, it will not work out at all.
Being made to believe if they went to college and stayed out of trouble, everything would work out for them has resulted in this high degree of disillusionment and loss of trust in political and economic systems. Millennials aren’t lazy. Instead, they feel lost; having done what they were told to do and not getting the expected results has left this generation feeling adrift without a roadmap leading them out of dependency and towards success and self-actualization. If the college degree is in a subject they no longer want to pursue, they need a new plan. Maybe career coaching can create options or insights to make that area of study viable. Perhaps another degree is now of more interest. It’s possible to develop a marketable skill or talent without returning to college. Additionally, instead of a traditional job setting, starting your own business with yourself or friends is an option. Figuring out what to commit to and doing it will bring about results.
The issue of too many choices is part of the millennial’s dilemma. Setting limits on how many options to consider at one time can help lower anxiety and clarify priorities, values. The internet, with all of its benefits, has created a place for millennials and the generations behind them a place to get lost, overwhelmed, and confused. Thinking more about others and how to fit into the system instead of isolating themselves in the digital world will be an essential part of this generation getting out of neutral gear and moving towards creating the life they want. Many millennials are beginning to realize by changing negative attitudes, breaking isolation, getting involved instead of engaging in passive complaining, and discovering what makes them happy, they will move into the next chapter of their lives and, in doing so, will make the country a better place for all. Taking action will replace pessimism with personal power.
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